Relationship JourneysSelf Awareness

Why your toxic friend doesn’t appreciate your self-awareness journey!

Photo by Liza Summer from Pexels
"Since you started this your self-awareness journey, you are such a bitch!
"Whatever do you mean? I am still the same person that you knew!"
"Aaaai, no, even when I come to you, you don't help me solve my problems. I feel like therapy has changed you for the worst.

This was a conversation between my friend and me. The former me would have persistently rushed to her side just to be “that friend” again. However, I paused just to understand where my friend was coming from with this accusation. Self-awareness truly is a blessing to those who practice it.

To interpret what my friend was saying in more words than one, “Since your self-awareness journey, You have changed so much that I can no longer exploit you.” Makes sense now? Don’t worry, it will in a sec. This friend of mine had formed the habit of coming to me with a sob story, the empath in me swiftly moves in to help only for my pal to disappear then reappear when she needed help. I would go the extra mile to not perhaps purchase something I truly wanted just so that she could sort her needs.

Please don’t get me wrong, helping others is good. Self-love dictates that you respectfully choose yourself first. So, the former me did not put myself first, all along I would put my friend first. I had a weakness of people-pleasing and loving too much. Now, should such a friend need my help, I don’t rush to be the savior, instead, I ask myself a very pertinent question, Is there anything I have perhaps planned to do with the money or my time? If the answer is affirmative, I would tell my friend, that I am currently not in a position to help her, hence the “You are such a bitch”, comment.

When you practice self-love and are more self-aware, those who reaped from you by being manipulative and taking advantage of your weaknesses, will complain and call you all sorts of things. Snob, bitch, carefree, don’t care attitudeā€¦ just to name a few. Why? Simply because through self-awareness, you chose to practice self-love and set boundaries. abuser doesn’t like boundaries. They live off your weaknesses (People pleasing, co-dependency, and other traumas that shape you). In their mind, they are thinking, how dare she choose not to be abused?

I am here to remind you that though you are fallen, you still are worthy. Keep finding yourself, love yourself, and walk your self-awareness journey with your head, held high. The people meant for you will appreciate and align themselves to your journey.

Yours Truly,

Self-aware Snob!

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